


Somebody get me through this nightmare

by justelaura



Series: The path of healing [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F, all my fics have a happy ending, all that blood looks good on you, because sapphics deserve a happy ending, but also fluff, gentle touch, possessed!ollie, shsapphicficathon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-12
Updated: 2020-01-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:34:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22230388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justelaura/pseuds/justelaura
Summary: “Oh well, won't you look at that?”She hears her own voice, distorted by the darkness and the evil of the thing using her human body as a vessel. Ollie feels sick. Sick and terrified by what the demon made her do. And by what the demon will make her do later.
Relationships: Ollie/Samantha (Shadowhunters TV)
Series: The path of healing [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1600183
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2
Collections: shadowhunters sapphic ficathon, shadowhunters sapphic library





	Somebody get me through this nightmare

**Author's Note:**

> Shadowhunters sapphic ficathon week 6! I'm truly loving this challenge and I lowkey don't want it to stop. 
> 
> Alright! This fic is the sequel of "Help me believe it's not the real me" but you don't need to read the first fic to understand this one! 
> 
> Fun fact: I think this is the first time I write a fic in the present tense... 
> 
> Prompt: all the blood looks good on you + gentle touch 
> 
> trigger warning:
> 
> *mention of murder
> 
> * trauma
> 
> * blood

Ollie hears the door shut behind her. She assumes she is the one who closed it since she is alone in the hallway, but she doesn't remember getting here.

“Sam?” She calls but no one answers.

Strange. Sam should be home by now. Ollie frowns. What time is it anyway?

She feels numb. She doesn't really know why. Her whole body feels so heavy, she struggles to walk.

What is happening?

She's so tired.

Trying to put her thoughts in order, she wants to pass her hands over her face, but she stops halfway. There's fresh blood. On her palms. Under her nails.

Ollie hyperventilates. Her hands start shaking and she rushes to the bathroom, stumbling and hitting the wall repeatedly.

When she enters the bathroom and faces the mirror she freezes.

She is covered in blood. Not just her hands. Her clothes. Her skin. Her hair. All of her body is painted red.

What happened?

Her memories come back out of nowhere and understanding hits her suddenly.

And then, she remembers.

She remembers how her mother begged this shadow looking like her daughter to stop and how life left her eyes when her heart had been ripped out of her chest.

_No_.

This can't be happening. This can't be real. But Ollie knows it's all true. It's real. She did this.

The pain and the guilt are so strong, Ollie feels like she's drowning. She wants to cry, she wants to scream, but her body isn't under her control anymore. Instead, she just starts laughing and comes closer to the mirror, like she's trying to admire herself. Which she does.

“Oh well, won't you look at that?”

She hears her own voice, distorted by the darkness and the evil of the thing using her human body as a vessel. Ollie feels sick. Sick and terrified by what the demon made her do. And by what the demon will make her do later.

_It wanted to make me kill again_ , Ollie realizes, _That's why I'm here. It wanted to find Samantha._

She can't get her eyes off of this disturbing reflection of herself. The Ollie in the mirror starts smiling and it's a creepy and predatory smile that keeps getting bigger and bigger. Ollie wishes she could make it disappear. But she can't move.

The demon laughs again. “All that blood looks good on you.”

_Get out_. Ollie yells internally. Will that even work? Could she exorcise a demon inhabiting her body all by herself? _Get out. Leave me alone._

She feels herself shaking her head as the demon makes a little noise of disapproval. “Oh no, I don't think so. I have too many things to do.”

_Get out._ _Go back to hell where you belong._

The demon, obviously annoyed, sighs. “You're a very stubborn human, aren't you? Well, let me explain the situation since you don't seem to realize how honoured you should be.”

_Honoured. Where is the honour of being possessed?_

“My mother needs sacrifices and you are the most perfect physical shell I could've ever found.”

_Why me?_ Ollie stops fighting. She's so desperate and so, so tired. There's nothing she can do.

“Because possession works better when the soul of the owner is pure. And yours is pure, one of the purest I've ever seen. If I'm being honest, I'm actually tempted to devour it.”

A shiver runs down Ollie's spine and she hears the demon laughing again. It knows she's terrified and it loves that.

“Don't worry, I'm too afraid to break you and lose my precious mortal coil so I won't do it. Lucky you!”

Ollie says nothing. She lowers her head in defeat.

“Good human,” The demon purrs “Now, let's go. Time is running out and we have more killing to do.”

Ollie looks at the glass again. There's the same creepy smirk on her lips.

And her eyes are entirely black.

* * *

Ollie sits up, wide awake and her heart beating fast. She needs some time before realizing where she is. It's dark, but Ollie still recognises the bedroom she shares with Sam. She inhales deeply.

She's home.

She looks next to her and smiles when she sees Sam sleeping peacefully. It helps her calm down. She brushes Sam's hair gently, not waking her up and then she leaves the bed quietly, knowing she won't be able to get more sleep.

She goes to the kitchen and boils water to make tea. She opens one of the cupboards and takes a little box full of infusion bags. A gift from Luke.

After that rough night where Ollie broke down in Sam's arms, she finally answered Luke's texts. Luke was so understanding and caring, opening up to him felt nice. That's when Ollie realized she had missed her friend so much. They started to call each other every evening and Luke would sometimes go and see Ollie and Sam to keep them company. During his last visit, he left this box for Ollie.

“I hope these infusions will help you sleep better.” He said and Ollie thanked him.

It's been a few weeks since the events with Lilith had happened and she's slowly getting better but the path of healing is long. The guilt is still there. And so are the nightmares.

She puts the hot water in a mug, adds the infusion. She doesn't really know what's in it, but she knows Luke is friends with warlocks so she assumes the ingredients might be kind of special.

She goes to the living room with her mug and sits down on the couch.

She drinks slowly, forcing herself to clear her head. She wishes she could forget the demon's voice.

When her mug is empty, Ollie wonders if she should stay here and wait for the morning to come or go back to sleep. She already misses the feeling of having Sam close to her so she chooses the bedroom.

When she lays down next to Sam, the latter moves on her side and looks at her with sleepy eyes. Ollie smiles and kisses her forehead.

“Did I wake you?” She whispered.

“No, I was actually going to look for you.”

“Well, I'm here. I just needed to make myself some herbal tea. ”

“Nightmare?” Sam asks gently and Ollie shakes her head.

“A memory.”

Sam comes closer and hugs her. Ollie breathes.

Sam doesn't ask her if she's okay because she knows it's pointless. Words are pointless. Sam knows Ollie by heart. And she knows her girlfriend doesn't want to talk about it because talking would make her relive the moment again.

And Ollie appreciates Sam's intention because the only thing she needs is support and even if Sam can't do much, that's more than enough.

Ollie caresses Sam's cheek with her thumb, drawing some imaginary circles. She wants to keep going, but when she raises her hands to cup Sam's face, she sees blood on her skin. She stops moving. She blinks and realizes there's nothing, she's just exhausted and her mind is playing tricks on her. She stays like that, looking at her hands and feeling overwhelmed again.

She's about to drown in her darkest thoughts when Sam takes her hands gently.

“Everything is okay,” Sam says “You're with me. It's over.”

Ollie exhales.

“It's over.” She repeats.

Sam nods. “Yes,” She drops light kisses all over Ollie's hands. You're safe.”

Ollie closes her eyes. She feels loved. She feels safe. Her breathing is slowing down and she's falling asleep. Maybe it's the infusion that kept its promise. Ollie doesn't really know. She just knows her amazing girlfriend helped a lot.

Sam intertwines their fingers together and smiles tenderly.

“Goodnight, my love.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> If you enjoyed, don't forget to let a comment and/or a kudo :)
> 
> You can find me on twitter ! (@Onceuponavideo1)
> 
> Special thanks to @randomrambler who beta read this fic!


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